If At First.....

Making important changes in your life, career or business is not easy. Overcoming years of conditioning in your thoughts, emotions and behaviour requires time and a good deal of effort. It often requires more than one attempt.

Many change initiatives are abandoned at the first sign of back-sliding.  However big change is almost always harder than you expect it to be. There are many setbacks, many lessons on what doesn't work, and many times when you have to endure a good failure or two to learn the necessary lessons you require to finally push through to success. 

The more you prepare for a change, the more emotions you involve, the more support you line up to keep you on track or remind you why you are doing this - the greater your chances of success will be.

Some people believe it is better to try and fail, than it is to never try at all.  However, there is enough good science, best practices and professional support available, to potential changers these days, that if you are committed you can make the change. And if you are serious about making some important changes, don't let a few steps backwards deter you.

If You Were Told To Change or Die, Could you Do It?

Imagine your doctor sits you down and tells you on no uncertain terms, "If you don't change your lifestyle, you will be dead in a year." What do you think the chances are that you would actually manage to eat a little better, exercise more, etc.?

The answer, and this has been well studied, is 1 in 7.* Shockingly, only 1 out of 7 patients that have the "change or die" conversation with their physician, are able to change their behaviour. And the point is, if 6 out of 7 of us have trouble making changes when our life literally depends on it, is it any surprise we struggle to make so many other changes in our lives, careers and businesses?

As we approach the time of the year when many of us reflect upon our living and consider the changes we want to make in the New Year, it is important to remember there are some changes we can make by ourselves but many more we simply cannot. These latter type of "adaptive" changes are those bigger challenges that require a change in mindset and behaviour. These types of changes take time, reinforcement and the power of relationship to help us revise limiting thoughts and assumptions. In short, there are changes that are very difficult for us human beings to do on our own - even when our life depends on it.

So if you are contemplating making some important changes this year, remember that your best intentions and willpower may simply not be enough to guarantee you the results you seek.

Thus, to better increase your odds of success, here are a few tips:

- Make sure that whatever you are trying to do, really does line up with what is truly important to you. (What you genuinely value.) Many changes fail simply because they conflict with a deeply held belief or value.

- Make sure you have a high level of commitment. A good rule of thumb is that you should have a 4 out of 5 level of commitment if you are going to be able to hang in there long enough to see through an important change. Anything less and you could easily be distracted or discouraged when things get tough or busy.

- Anticipate resistance. Anytime we attempt to move out of our comfort zone we run into resistance. Some of these thoughts/feelings/habits can completely sideline us if we are not ready for them. When the resistance shows up, get curious about any assumptions or assertions that undermine your change initiative. Chances are they are based on faulty or out of date information that no longer serves you.

- Design your support team. Big changes can be scary. Call in backup. Make sure you have a few key people you can share your goal with and turn to when things get tough. We really benefit from relationships that can remind us why we are doing something, help us examine our limiting beliefs and help us see where growth is waiting to happen. (We are all blind to some of the biggest changes we really need to make - to get the results we want.)

Good luck with all your goals, dreams and aspirations for the upcoming year. If you can dream it, and it makes your heart sing, if you take care of yourself day to day so you don't get exhausted, if you build on your strengths, if you can take it a step at a time and reach out for help when, or before, you need it, and if you can be open to the journey taking you in a different direction than you initially planned - then I believe you are going to have a fabulous adventure in the New Year.

Good luck,

Life and Business Coach Steve